Profilectlx.Carlene Tan Li Xuan 11th July 1988. Currently 23+. Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School, SRJC (first 3 months), TPJC, NUS FASS (econs). loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.
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Saturday, January 26, 2008It's 11 days more to CNY!!!SO EXCITING!!! =) Well, went out for kaya toast this afternoon. kr's in camp so didn't get to go out with him. =S He's going to be in camp again next week. =( Ah wells, but I've got duty the whole of Sun next week so guess I won't be able to have much time either. Tutorials start this Mon!!! ARGH!!! I am so not looking forward to it. Think i digressed. After kaya toast, I headed home, practised my piano a little and my mum called to tell me she's at TM. Finally got some stuff that I need for CNY just now, but think i need to go back and change it. Haha... its complicated. Think i mentioned previously that my "new year resolution" is to be a better person right? I suddenly feel pretty lost as to how I should go about doing that. Define a better person. Does being a better person mean willing to go out to all extent to help someone? Or does it mean being considerate and kind to how others feel? Ah.. don't know man... Oh right, and one more thing that's been on my mind... It's about hall. Part of me really wants to stay in hall because this is where I've made my friends, but another part of me doesn't want to stay cause I know I don't have enough points as of now so I don't know if I should continue pushing my hopes that I'll be able to stay next sem. Plus currently, hall life isn't going too smoothly for me I guess, I realise what this senior said was true... that friends do come and go... it ain't like that of sec school anymore. So i really don't know... ah wells. Okie, think i shall end here. Haha... nothing much to say really... Oh yeah, wanna thank the people who went kaya toast-ing with me today, really sorry not all of us enjoyed it. =S This is one reason why I sometimes hesitate to bring people to food places. Get pretty upset when they don't enjoy it. I mean you know how it isn't nice to disappoint people right? Furthermore they travelled pretty far for it. Hm... Take care everyone! Let's all look forward to a better tomorrow!! YEAH! =) Wednesday, January 16, 2008Feeling pretty down today. Wonder if its PMS as in Post-MS? Haha...Just feel rather disappointed at myself for not being able to bring a team together even though I'm a vice-captain. I believe that a team truly excels when members are bonded together. No? Things just seem to get harder as we grow older, or maybe it's just me. I just wish I could stop growing older because as the years go by, I feel like I'm winding up into a whole lot of politics, be it in school or even in halls. It just eats away that "fuzzy" feeling of being a family. Maybe I think too much, but that's exactly how I feel right now. I would much rather stay that 16 year old that knows nothing about the world. Just remain that sheltered girl from SAC because then, everyone was nice and spared a thought for others. Ok, maybe not everyone but most. In those times, I didn't even need to speak for my friends to know I'm not alright, or that I need a nice big hug, they just know it. I do welcome changes, just that it's getting so complicated I wish time would freeze. Naive? Immature? Guess I am, but I'd rather stay that way. At least in my little world, everyone is happy and everyone's goal is to make everyone else happier. You know it's wierd how you can have so many people around you but no one truly understands how you feel. Perhaps that's why I'm showing my emotions more explicitly now, but I'm kind of starting to hate myself for doing that since I've been emotionally strong all along. I mean it's just this kind of feeling that makes one feel empty? No wonder I miss my besties so much. Haha... Alright, I'm starting to make myself sound pathetic but I'm not. =) I've got a whole lot of people supporting me and that's good enough for me. Though of course, being greedy by nature, you just wish for more people to be able to understand you better right? Haha.. OK. Don't think I'm making any sense, haha... Well, hopefully this Sunday I can play with no regrets, IF I am playing. =) Feeling much better now after blogging my whole chunk of rubbish. =D Take care everyone!! I hope all of you are doing ok, and if you do share the same sentiments, just know you're not alone and I'll always be there to lend a listening ear k? =) *hugz* |